I did it, I did the five stars at PK today. No need to wait until July, no need to do anything any more at all. Mission accomplished, standing on the deck of an aircraft carrier with a sock stuffed down the front of my flight suit.

Only.. it wasn't much of an accomplishment. Barely left a dent. I know I've had hotter curry there, and they called it three stars. Have they gotten tired of people ordering hot then complaining that it's too hot? Or is it me? Has this capsaicin resistance programme really been so effective? I thought the five-star mark would be the objective bar over which I high-jumped my taste buds, but I have my doubts. There's no question I'm eating spicy food more regularly than I ever have before; the question is: am I a different person, a changed man with broader boundaries? Or just another guy abusing his GI tract?